My husband and I have been two joy-filled and grateful parents with the recent safe return of our son, a Marine, from a long deployment.
The whole experience felt like it went on forever, with only sporadic communication between us, when time (and opportunity) would allow for us to connect; and yet, it also felt like everything went by in a snap, in the blink of an eye.
We all knew that when we saw each other again we would have changed quite a bit in one another's eyes. After all, we had never been apart for so long.
Separate experiences, especially our son's, caused a lot of growth, maturity, and some independence to develop.
Our son came back with a sense of pride yet extremely humbled by all that he saw and experienced while on his deployment. He came back with ties stronger than ever to his buddies, his “brothers” in the Corps, with a bond that is unbreakable.
They all learned what it meant to have one another's back, and to take care of each other because they were all they had.
What a gift to be able to see one another continue to grow and develop, each in our own unique way.
And my husband and I, after spending time just the two of us, and going through the various experiences that we went through while our son was away, developed a bond that is stronger than ever.
We have a new sense of what it truly means to be just “us” now, and to not only be fully comfortable with that, but to enjoy this new chapter of having a now fully-grown child, independent of us and with his own life.
Being together again, listening to all the stories and experiences our boy shares with us, we have a new respect as the gap between us closes, and the conversations become more adult and real-world oriented.
What a wonderful and beautiful thing to experience, this evolution of a parent-child relationship...
What a gift to be able to see one another continue to grow and develop, each in our own unique way.
And so now, as we go forward into this uncharted territory of true independence (our son just celebrated his 20th birthday—incredible!), we're gaining an opportunity, because of our time apart, to truly savor every moment we do have together.
We continue to develop this bond of trust, communication, and closeness between us, while also practicing respect for one another's space, personal desire, freedom, and growth.
It's a learning process, with constant adjustments having to be made—but that's life, isn't it?
It requires constant listening, constant tweaking.
And with so many rich and deep experiences taking place in just the past twenty years alone, and so many memories being formed, I look forward to all that the next twenty will bring, God willing.
Where will we all be?
What will life look like for each of us?
I guess we'll all just have to wait and see what time brings...
In the mean time, we're simply happy as clams to have our son back on home soil, safe and sound.
Taste what's good and pass it on.
Ingrid
“From The Heart” is a space for me to share some of my more personal thoughts on life. Here you'll find my reflections on my own inner/spiritual journey; on being a wife and mother; on being a creative; and general observations, pretty much whatever is on my mind.
I whole-heartedly believe that sharing 'from the heart' with one another is what connects us, heals us, and inspires us! Glad you're here...
Geri
What an achievement! May God truly
Bless all of you...Geri
The Cozy Apron
Geri, thank you so very much for your kind words; we very much appreciate them! Blessings to you!
Roseanne Sabol
Oh, Ingrid!! Such good news, having your son home safe and sound. Our daughter turned 21 yesterday and so we, too, are navigating new waters, all 3 of us. She is home for the summer and will go back in August for senior year. We have learned to relish these days of just the two of us and it's is a bit of an adjustment each summer when she returns. After we've gotten our rhythm back, it's such a joy and blessing to see the maturity blossoming and to appreciate her in this adult way.
I'm so happy your man-child is home safely and I look forward to hearing how life develops for all of you.
Sending love and blessings ~ Roseanne
The Cozy Apron
Roseanne, you expressed that perfectly...it does take some getting used to, having all of us together in the house after the hubs and I have gotten so used to a particular way of being, "just us". (Our son is visiting with us for the week now.) From the food we eat (what I cook for us, how much), to getting used to a different energy, to adjusting to everyone's various schedules...But like you said: once we get acclimated, it's quite a beautiful thing to witness, us interacting and coming together. You're daughter is a year older than our boy...both June babies! They're so wonderfully autonomous, aren't they? I guess we were just like them at that age, too...So wonderful to hear from you, as always. Much love!
Patty
Hi Ingrid,
Thanks for sharing your family stories. You are the only blogger I have found who explores the experiences of mothering grown-ups. It's a comfort to know we are all in this together.
Enjoy your time with your son! I appreciate his sacrifice for all of us!
The Cozy Apron
Hi Patty, thank you so much for your loving sentiments! And you know, I never really thought of it that way, that I'm exploring what it is to "mother a grown-up"; when you wrote that, it really hit me in a new, profound way, so thank you! I suppose to some extent we'll always see them as our "little ones", only because a momma can never forget all those early years; but we all do learn to adapt and see them for who they are in the present moment. Such a journey, isn't it? Thank you for commenting.
Lisa
Ingrid,
I am so happy that you have continued From the Heart as part of your blog. I subscribed about six months ago and enjoy every post. The fact that it comes personally addressed and your thoughts and experiences are always inspirational and a pleasure to read. The photos are incredible and always make you want to try something even when the ingredients are not to your liking.
The Cozy Apron
Lisa, I so very much appreciate that! So glad to know you are enjoying these posts, and that you feel you gain a little uplift when you read them. I'm grateful and honored to have your readership, and your kind words in regards to our photos are also so very much appreciated—glad they make even those ingredients that your aren't the biggest fan of appealing! Michael, my hubby, will love that.